I’m on vacation this week, but I wanted to share this post that I originally posted last year.
Mother’s day is upon us and hopefully we will remember to call our mothers, send a card, or in someway let them know we love them and are thankful for what they mean to us. Those of us that have children surrounding us will be getting lots of hugs and kisses, homemade cards, and little gifts that they really can’t keep a secret. (Mine is pink, Stefan says, but he won’t tell me more 😉 ).
I hope that we all have a joyful day on Sunday.
But there are some for whom this day hurts. And I just want to take a moment to remind you not to forget them.
The Motherless Child
I was walking through the grocery store the other day and everywhere I looked were signs of Mother’s Day. Of course, this is just a commercial agenda to buy more, but hopefully it will remind people to not forget their mothers. I couldn’t help but think of seven children I know, my cousin’s children, who might find these signs of Mother’s Day painful. Mother’s Day accentuates what they already know all to well. They don’t have a mother anymore, and all their friends do. Sunday they will spend their first Mother’s Day without their mom to give sticky cards to and tight hugs. Their hearts are going to ache. If you know a child in this situation, you may or may not be able to do anything. But, at least, remember to pray for them. The memories will be hard.
The One With Painful Memories of Their Mother
It pains me to think that some have horrible memories of their mother. I am beyond blessed to have had a wonderful and loving mother, so I do not understand the depths of your pain. But if this is you, or someone you know, Mother’s Day can be a dark spot on the calendar. The day they are reminded of everything there mother was not. The day memories they have tried to forget somehow jump to their minds. Be sensitive. Not everyone had a loving mother.
The One Who Has Yet to Mother
The ache of empty arms seems heavier on this day. As all the moms around you are enjoying the day, this woman seems to be just a bystander. Aching to be a part, and yet wondering if she ever will. Whether you have been trying to conceive for 2 years or 10 years, the yearning is ever present. Be sensitive and aware.
I would encourage you to remember your friends that might be in anyone of these places. It can seem awkward, but I promise you, they will be grateful. Tell them you are thinking about them, especially on Mother’s Day. Write them a card. However small, acknowledge that you understand that this day is difficult. Don’t just do nothing.
I remember last year going up to my friend and telling her I was thinking about her. I had a 3-year-old grabbing onto my leg, I was holding my daughter, and I was visibly pregnant. Sometimes because we don’t want to make them more sad we just keep our distance. But, thankfully I have had friends tell me that that is much worse. Obviously, I have not struggled with infertility, and yes, that means I don’t truly understand. But I do care. And letting my friends know I care means a lot.
I hope that for you, Mother’s Day is a truly joyful day! I will be savoring the little things with my kids. Because these years truly do fly by!
How will you be spending Mother’s Day?